Showing posts with label Utah Jazz. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Utah Jazz. Show all posts

Jazz Domination Update

February 14, 2008 | Comments (0) | by Governor X

We've come to the NBA's All Star Break and the Utah Jazz are on a roll winning 12 of 13. This is of course your first Jazz Domination Update of the 07/08 season, but since the NBA doesn't really get interesting until this time of year there wasn't much point.

With all the hoopla over Shaq, Pau Gasshole, and Jason Kidd, you may have forgotten the earlier trade Utah pulled off of Giricek for Kyle Korver. Korver has been a solid addition to the Jazz and in the area it matters most, they're 18-3 since that trade. Kidd and Shaq are both washed up. The only deal that concerns me in the slightest is Pau Gasshole going to the Lakers. They basically traded a box of last weeks bagels for him. Fuck you Memphis. Fortunately, since he's good, Kobe "Summer's Eve" Bryant will eventually butt heads with him and drive him out of town.

Then there's AK47. As you may recall, Kirilenko was designated a
person of interest after espousing his desire to be traded on a Russian blog. Well, you haven't heard much from him since. There is still the occasional trade rumor popping up, but they're usually bogus like the Ben Wallace for AK47 rumor coming out of Chicago. Wishful thinking Bulls fans.

On a final note, you may not have heard, since the sports media largely ignores the Jazz, but C-Booze put up his first career triple double against the Sonics last night.

Person of Interest: Andrei Kirilenko

September 20, 2007 | Comments (0) | by Governor X

On the news, you always hear the phrase "person of interest" when the cops want to talk to someone but aren't yet ready to indict them for a crime. I don't think a War Criminal is warranted yet, hence, Person of Interest: Andrei Kirilenko

Andrei, seen here about to pummel Rocky Balboa, recently posted his desire to leave the Utah Jazz on a Russian blog. Frankly, if Utah wants him back after last year, he should consider himself damn lucky.

As chronicled here, the Jazz went to the Western Conference Finals, thanks in large part not to Kirilenko, but to Deron "Mormon Chocolate" Williams. Kirilenko put up paltry numbers when he was actually healthy in 06-07, only contributing half the points per game he had the previous three seasons.

According to official Russian translators at Interpol, Andrei apparently "can't stomach" the idea of playing for Jerry Sloan anymore. Memo to Andrei: Sloan's system is why the team has ALWAYS been so successful. Deal with it or become an afterthought in some Eastern Conference gulag like Charlotte.

Given that he made this anouncement on a Russian blog and did it so close to camp opening, he's lucky I'm not handing down a full slate of indictments for war crimes. I can't totally forsake the guy given his contributions to the team over the years.

I just hope the Jazz can get value for him in return.

Who is Morris Almond?

June 29, 2007 | Comments (0) | by Governor X

Apparently the newest member of the Utah Jazz. Should I be happy? Hell if I know. Those fickle old white men at the Salt Lake Tribune are divided, but it sounds like the kid was highly rated. Since I'd rather watch grass grow than college basketball, I have no idea. We'll see what the 2007-2008 season brings. I'm just going to say now, its going to bring an NBA championship to Salt Lake.

And it Came to Pass...

June 01, 2007 | Comments (0) | by Governor X

The glorious run of the Utah Jazz came to an end earlier this week at the hands of the hated and loathed San Antonio Spurs. I am understandably devastated, but also somewhat encouraged. This is a young team with a lot of talent and I'm excited about next year. I don't think anyone else here cares about the NBA, so this is likely the last you'll hear about it until next season.

The (Western Conference) Final Countdown

May 16, 2007 | Comments (0) | by Governor X


Ah yes, another day, another victory for the Utah Jazz...

Utah dispatched the Warriors 100-87 Tuesday night and advance to the Western Conference Finals for the first time since 1998. Carlos Boozer and Andrei Kirilenko (aka Ivan Drago) had 21 points and D-Fish had 20. Utah out rebounded Golden State 59-35.

Good news for me as a Jazz fan and good news for all of the Warriors fans that came out of the woodwork after they beat Dallas. They can all go back to whatever it is they do when Golden State is winning 20 games a year. Bring on San Anphoenix...

Heart of a Champion

May 06, 2007 | Comments (0) | by Governor X

"Are you there God? Its me, the NBA - I'm still around."

Well, the only team that matters to me is still around, the Utah Jazz. They led Houston by as many as 16 last night and ended up winning 103-99. It was the first game of the series, or between the two teams all year, where the visiting team won. Which leads me into rant one...

Utah should have had home court advantage. Sure Houston had a couple more wins, but Utah won their division. MLB has this one right. If you can't win your division, you are a lesser team.

Rant two...

Headlines are not "Utah Advances!" but "McGrady Fails to Advance." Who gives a shit? The guy looks like he is asleep anyway. Utah beginning another destiny fueled run at the finals is far more interesting.


Rant three...

Yao Ming had 29 points. When did he rack these up? I watched the game and pretty much everytime he got the ball he fumbled and bumbled as bad as I would. Unless he is suddenly NOT the tall asian man, I can safely say Yao didn't do shit last night.

Enough ranting. Thanks to Dallas' epic collapse, Utah gets the Golden State Warriors next. Thats fate. Home court advantage and a crappy opponent. Its meant to be this year.


Deron Williams is by far the most tattooed man in the state of Utah - and the only tattooed man in Utah without a tattoo of Joseph Smith or the Angel Moroni.

NBA: Jazz Dominating Again

November 18, 2006 | Comments (0) | by Governor X

You'll have to pardon me as I don my cap as Thunder Matt's rogue Utah Jazz correspondent. After two years in the wilderness of mediocrity following the departure of Stockton and Malone, the Utah Jazz are back on top of the NBA's Western Conference with a big time 8-1 record. Much of that has been accomplished without Andrei Kirilenko (AK-47), arguably their best player.

Even a franchise best 57 points from Milwaukee's Michael Redd couldn't stop the Jazz from rolling to their second best start in franchise history. Whats the difference this year? Simply put, Jerry Sloan once again has the solid bench he has lacked the previous two seasons. The starting five for Utah since Stockton and Malone left has been solid with Kirilenko and Boozer anchoring the team, but they lacked quality bench players that could go to late in the game.

They play Phoenix tonight with a chance to tie the best franchise start ever, 9-1 in 1999. One final note...since 1991, the LA Clippers are 1-29 at the Delta Center in Salt Lake. That stat was just too sweet to ignore.