Showing posts with label Old Dudes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Old Dudes. Show all posts

The War on Errorism

October 15, 2009 | Comments (0) | by Ginger Russ

Last night a friend and I were having a nice dinner before going to see a Yo La Tengo show (excellent performance btw, check them out on You Tube if you get a chance). Discussing how our days went, she had brought up that she was having a business lunch with one of her clients and a couple co-workers. They were talking about their industry and how it was a "perfect storm" that the economy had fallen apart so quickly along with a downturn in their industry's performance. One of her co-workers, who has obviously never been in an actual business/social situation, brought up an interesting email that she had just read about the President and the brewing of another "perfect storm". The email alluded to the election of President Obama on the basis of "change" and then went on to compare the current state of the United States to Germany in the 30's. It concluded with many similar correlations between Obama and Hitler.

Notwithstanding the obvious faux-paw of my friend's co-worker of mixing politics with social situations, let alone business ones, combined with the fact that my friend is half-Jewish, it amazed me that this person would actually not only repeat this, but present this as fact without a little fact checking. So I did my own. The article she was referring to was actually an email from a Harvard professor entitled History Unfolding. He obviously has his credentials and knows what he is talking about:

David Kaiser is a respected historian whose published works have covered a broad range of topics, from European Warfare to American League Baseball. Born in 1947, the son of a diplomat, Kaiser spent his childhood in three capital cities: Washington D.C., Albany, New York, and Dakar, Senegal. He attended Harvard University, graduating there in 1969 with a B.A. in history. He then spent several years more at Harvard, gaining a PhD in history, which he obtained in 1976. He served in the Army Reserve from 1970 to 1976. He is a professor in the Strategy and Policy Department of the United States Naval War College and has previously taught at Carnegie Mellon, Williams College and Harvard University. Kaiser’s latest book, The Road to Dallas, about the Kennedy assassination, was just published by Harvard University Press.

And here is an excerpt of the correlation between Obama and Hitler:
As a serious student of history, I thought I would never come to experience what the ordinary, moral German must have felt in the mid-1930s In those times, the “savior” was a former smooth-talking rabble-rouser from the streets, about whom the average German knew next to nothing. What they should have known was that he was associated with groups that shouted, shoved, and pushed around people with whom they disagreed; he edged his way onto the political stage through great oratory. Conservative “losers” read it right now.

Seems pretty consistent, right? Except for the fact that the "email" was a fraud and was debunked by the author himself shortly afterward. On his blog of the same name as the email, Dr. Kaiser (it was incorrectly stated that he is not a doctor, but his comment proved my lack of research, so much for the post!?!) informs us:

The first two sentences, beginning, "For the past thirty years," were of course written by me; the rest of the email was not written by me. Its views are in many ways the opposite of my own. It is apparently some sort of conservative disinformation campaign, quite possibly the work of a single individual, designed to muddy the political waters by falsely attributing views to others. I obviously regret the deception.

OMG! Something fake on the internet! Alert the internet police. Seriously though, if you've made it this far into this post you have probably already heard or read this story. The comparing of Obama to Hitler is nothing new.

Websites like Obama Is Literally Hitler make radical comparisons all the time, ranging from the subtle: Hitler, Stalin, Mussolini and Castro being nominated for a Nobel Peace prize (none of them won, and if you do your research, basically anyone can nominate someone for the prize), to the absurd: Hitler also had a white Mother.

But this is not my beef. Of course the internet is riddled with opinions and false truths. This is nothing new to most of us, except when it comes to a reader finding something that supports their extremist views, be it right or left. It's amazing when someone finds something that is questionably fake that they will totally ignore researching the source or facts within and start mass-mailing everyone to share in the "great reveal" that they have just discovered. The greatest fail is that most of these people are actually well educated. But in their spree to "teach" others, they forget the basic principals of their higher education.

Even as an art major I had to write multiple research papers for my art history classes, and having one of the most respected Art Historians in the country as my professor, he didn't just put up with turning in any old fluff and bullshit. Many nights were spent in the library, scouring through articles and books, checking my facts to support my arguments. So when I hear that someone is spreading the "truth" of something they found on the internet it astounds me. It took me all of 10 seconds to not only find the email that my friend's co-worker was talking about, but also that it was fake.

So please, do not take this post as support or decent against our President. It is not about right or left wing hypocrisy. I'll leave that to people like Rush Limbaugh, who thought that he was not being talked about enough in the mainstream media so he popped his fat melon into the world of the NFL and once showed us that, yes, it is all about you Rush. For the same reasons that Rush will not be an owner of a pro football team, you should research and educate yourself on something before you start spewing opinion as fact. Learn from people like my friend's co-worker and don't make yourself into a self-righteous, uninformed asshole.

Now if you excuse me, I have to write an a post about how Jimmy Clausen is the new Joe Montana.

I Can't Drive 25

August 05, 2009 | Comments (0) | by Ginger Russ

Yeah bitch, your steering wheel is on the wrong side of the car for starters.

Hey asshole! Yeah, you trying to turn ONTO the off ramp. Oh, wait you just realized that you were turning into oncoming traffic. Apparently that 18 wheeler barreling down on you triggered some sort-of fight or flight response. Amazingly, you made the right decision.

Only now you're trying desperately trying to get back into the lane from whence you came. Except now the traffic behind you no longer has a red stoplight, so they are coming at you going 50 mph. Look, the guy in front of me coming at you figured it out. Thank God. But now neither of you can figure out where to go from here, so you've both given up. Great. A Mexican standoff. A game of chicken between two stopped cars.
WILL SOMEONE FUCKING GO!?!

Hey look, while I'm stopped and waiting for both of you, some douchebag in a F-350 with a lift kit is coming up from behind me and is apparently getting a blowjob or something, because he's not slowing down. Apparently he doesn't understand the red lights on the back of my car mean I have the brakes applied. Whew, he finally realizes he is about totally rear end me and locks up hits breaks, coming about 6 inches from monster truck driving over my Honda Civic.

Thank God! It looks like doucebag A and douchebag B have decided that they want to join the rest of us on the road and actually drive our cars. I pull up behind and next to said douchebags at the next stoplight. Hey, OLD DUDES, are you okay? Cause it looks like Jesus took your souls back in 1982. Seriously, are those sunglasses, or just a black sheet of construction paper designed to look like shades. YOU ARE OLD AS FUCK!

I understand living in Arizona, complaining about old people driving is like surfing in shark infested waters with a bleeding foot and not expecting to get eaten, but GET OFF THE ROAD!

When I moved to Arizona a couple years ago I got my new license. It doesn't expire until 2043. No, that's not a typo. I don't have to renew my license in more than 30 years! I will be past retirement age by that time and be one of those old fucks on the road, all driving around willy-nilly without a care or clue as to what's going on around me.

Until then, in order to not die while driving on the highway I have to follow the rules of driving survival in Arizona, because if it's not a 103 year old retiree in a Cadillac, it's a 16 year old sophomore girl, texting her friend and teasing her hair. Did you also know that in Arizona driving school is optional? My girlfriend grew up here and doesn't have a clue about the basic rules of the road. I had to learn to how to drive by taking a driving class in high school, everyday, for an entire semester, in the middle of the winter on unplowed roads. Out here, nothing.

Anyways, the basic rules on how native Arizonians drive on the highway:

  1. The on-ramp is used to achieve a speed of 20 mph before entering a highway of cars going 65 miles an hour, thus making sure to cut off cars and cause backups and accidents while merging.
  2. The left lanes of the highway are used for the slowest cars.
  3. Unlike most states, AZ has no minimum speed limit, so by all means, drive 30 mph if you feel like it, but make sure to use the left hand lanes.
  4. If you need to change lanes, just do it. Don't worry about checking your mirrors or blind spot. Just make sure not to use your turn signal, or if you do, make sure to use the wrong one.
  5. If you are going to stay in your lane, make sure to have your turn signal on. Nothing says I'm paying attention like driving for 15 miles with your right turn signal on.
  6. Those lane lines: just suggestions.
  7. Make sure to come to a complete stop for anything on the side of the road with flashing lights. Not just accidents, but regular traffic stops. You never know what you might see, and it's not like people are trying to go anywhere.
  8. Talking on the phone or texting is a must. And none of that Bluetooth shit.
  9. If you need to leave the highway, make sure to wait until the very last moment, and then cut across 3 lanes of traffic to get to the off ramp. Remember to of course ignore your mirrors, blind spot and turn signal.
  10. If it for some crazy reason rains, the new speed limit is now 30 mph. But seriously, feel free to drive 15 mph if you feel safer. I mean, it's just a highway.

So there you have it. If you plan on coming out to visit for Spring Training next year, be sure to remember these rules to avoid the inevitable accident of being someone who actually knows how to drive.

Go Cubs!